Attack of the Poser II
Link was walking down Hyrule Market when he saw something incredibly ugly. It had fake blonde hair with the brown roots showing and horrible black hair extensions. What ever it was it didn’t have the balls to really die its hair. And its face was like every horror he had ever seen in his life. “Oh my goddesses it’s Hilary Duff! And she’s not airbrushed, the horror!”
Just then the Hyrule guards came and arrested her instantly. But no they weren’t just any police force, they were the Fashion Police! *thunder and lightning* Anyway they arrested her for the crime of being a fat ass in a none fat ass zone. Her punishment after the court case was to have the fat sucked dry out of her.
“Link,” said Zelda, “do you think her ass is better then mine?” but Link said,
“The only man who could like her ass would be a ghetto man...a very ghetto man *thumbs up* well after the incident of her hard core punk style every punk dude was going after her chanting “Bring back Dead Kennedy’s!” bad news for Hilary and her lack of fat...
But Hilary wanted to be on thing...the next Baby Spice! Because of her baby far. Buuuuut she wasn’t British and had the fat sucked out of her. Hyrule had an even bigger problem. She wouldn’t stop eating! Every one knew that Link the Hero of Time would face this new foe. But on one condition: he wouldn’t have to touch her at all. Link took her on. But then the war wagon came to Zelda’s house with Link’s body. Soon after that Hilary came to put on a concert and killed everyone with her voice.
